Truth

Monday 26 November 2012

COLD


A four letter word that has lingered my mind for the past one month.
Have tried all I can to push it away, but in mind it became a growth.
It interfered with my normal routine and a hazard to my health.
Had to look for a remedy but my mind was filled with filth.

It’s hard to play apart in your life that really doesn’t define who you really are inside,
Putting a picture that projects a different view of things is to subside.
Indeed being cold inside and trying to beat the extra mile in being warm outside
Difficult, but it’s like changing a word to mean the same like saccharide.

That’s another name meaning sweet, but that’s passive
When cold you lack affection, warmth, feeling, you become unemotional calculating and repulsive,
Positive becomes negative, with time the situation becomes corrosive,
And you long for a palliative.

That’s a remedy in search of warmth, but to me it was an exploration
Since the feeling was kinda new, it was like some kind of a tour to the nation
Meeting all kinds of people around, and portraying a negative action
That was my obligation and I did it without hesitation

The affirmation of your weakness sickens your meekness
Soon all your liveliness is turned to deep sadness
And everything around you becomes some sort of a wilderness
Wretchedness, dolefulness are a result and you start to long for kindness

Something that is way beyond your control at this stage
The more the days go by the more you become flat with age
Unemotional to every feeling brought out adding points to your mileage
At this stage only a miracle can bring you back, coz your at wreckage

Every part of your body is against you, and you feel like you’re at war
Bed rest is what the doctor offered, but it didn’t work coz u owe
You owe your inner spirit peace, but you can’t attain it coz of what you wore
You wore a negative suit, that led to your illness, thus the COLD won

I started thinking of a remedy, and started listening to the wrong voices
My life at this juncture was useless, and that is as what my determinant says
I had no control of my life, my life was driven and it was at ace
Having a cold is the worst feeling a person can endure, I said that with a sigh

Why should I continue to suffer? Is it worth it really?
Death was the only option, at this stage, coz everybody thought I was rascally
I never gave myself options for a cure, I just wanted to end it, desperately
So I over dozed that night, and took a nap, the pain eased greatly
All this time, all the things I did, everyone I knew, reflected in my mind
It felt like a new beginning and I actually thought it was the end
I started to remember my childhood times, how we used to hold hands
Love we had for each other, the joy, the happiness and I couldn’t allow all this to end
At this moment, when everything was coming to an end, he held my hand

He showed me peace, he taught me love, he gave me faith and a new beginning
I held his hand tightly, I didn’t want to let go, coz this feeling is what have been longing
 I wanted to know more about him, so the bible became my everyday building
It gave a strong foundation, and no one could break since the bond was sealed

Cold, it became a four letter word, that I only heard about, but never to experience it
I grabbed on to what was ahead and not what was on the review
It became a past, that I remember with great joy, coz it became a testimony
A testimony, A Test that I once mourned about, but now am in harmony